Relax, your moodiness has little to do with anything you’re doing and much to do with the hormonal roller coaster inside of you. One day your estrogen is up and progesterone is down; the next day it’s just the opposite. Who wouldn’t be weepy with all of that going on?
Hormonal fluctuations can take you from the heights of great joy to the depths of dark depressions. Woo hoo! This is one ride you could do without! Unfortunately, there isn’t much good news here. This ride can last for months before and after your pregnancy. What you have to hope for is that those closest to you aren’t damaged in the wake of the storm raging inside of you.
As hard as it is to handle, you’d do well to remember the affect your emotions can have on your loved ones and work associates. By educating yourself about the reality of hormone-related mood swings, you can share what you learn with those affected by them.
Let’s start at the very beginning…a very good place to start! The first trimester is a time for feeling unstable and depressed. This dream-come-true time of your life seems to be lingering under clouds of grey. And if your pregnancy wasn’t planned, your conflicting emotions will only lend themselves to even cloudier skies. Your crying spells can make you feel like you are out of control, which will further validate your feelings of inadequacy.
“How on earth can I bring a baby into my life,” you wail, certain that your child is doomed with you as a mother.
It’s okay. What you’re going through is normal, unless your depression becomes overwhelming and the crying gets out-of-hand, in which case it is important to speak with your OB as soon as possible.
Now let’s talk about the other thing that’s bugging you…fatigue! Yet another thing you can’t do much about. Of course, it’s important that you take care of yourself and adhere to all the pre-natal instruction you receive. But even if you follow it all to the letter, fatigue will plague you nonetheless. So, take a nap when you can. Cut out unnecessary activities. Listen to your body and rest when you need to. If you don’t, expect the emotional roller coaster to include some super duper loops!
Be ready as you’re climbing out of the depression dip to hit the top of the hill and feel exhilarated! As you look at the world from the top of the coaster, you’re sure you’ll never be depressed again and then…wham! Around the corner and down the hill you go, gaining speed with each passing moment. Your baby blues are blinking back the wind-whipped tears!
Now’s the time when your partner may need to pay closer attention to what he says and does because any little comment or look directed your way is bound to set you off! Understand when he retreats. After all, you’re no longer the sweet, loving, confident woman he fell in love with. He simply doesn’t know who you are anymore!
But watch that you don’t view his withdrawal as rejection, or the bitter cycle will regain its momentum. Talk to each other. Make him realize that this has nothing to do with him. And be sure to let him know how much you need his love and support right now. Recognizing the situation as what it is will help you both deal with it with the right attitudes.
The second trimester is the time for smooth sailing. You’ll feel more energetic and peaceful. People will remark about the ‘glow’ you radiate. Feeling the first kicks from your little quarterback is exciting and both you and your partner can revel in this new body of yours, fuller breasts and all!
Impatience, anxiety and fear of the unknown start to dominate the third trimester. It’s natural to fear labor and delivery. It’s common to feel inadequate as a mother. It’s inevitable that you start to feel uncomfortable. Sensuality might flee as you look in the mirror at your expanding waistline and think you’re starting to look like a beached whale! And let’s talk sex….or perhaps not.
Most likely, it won’t be on your top ten list of things you want to do today! Again, talk this out so that your partner doesn’t feel rejected or wonder what he’s doing wrong. After all, he still sees you as the fabulously sexy woman of his dreams!
When it comes to dealing with the many changes pregnancy brings, the key is education. The more you know, the less surprises there will be. It’s your job to prevent the hormone-induced emotional roller coaster from running away with your joy. C’mon, flash those baby blues and smile!
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