Womb to Bloom - Maternity & Beyond

Being a big brother probably seemed like a great idea while that baby was still in your stomach. But from the minute you go into labor your firstborn’s world is about to be rocked! Up until that day he was the center of the universe and he’s about to be unceremoniously de-throned! Of course this article applies to big sisters-to-be as well but I'm just gearing it toward my own experience. :)

Before the baby comes make sure your ‘soon to be big guy’ has some idea what he’s in for. Get some books on bringing baby home and on becoming a big brother. Let him help you set up the baby’s room. He can help stack diapers and put clothes in the drawers. Make sure the room is set up before the baby comes to get your son used to the idea. And make sure you’re not kicking him out of his room! Make any major changes to his sleeping arrangements well before the baby comes, so he doesn’t feel like he’s been evicted!

Get him his own doll and accessories. You can show him how the baby will need to be fed and changed. After the baby comes, and you’ve got your hands full you can say, “Hey I think your baby (doll) is hungry. How about you go feed him while I feed your sister.”

You think you were busy with your first baby, just wait till you juggle two! Your son is used to having you all to himself, and now he has to share you. So before the baby comes get your son used to playing for short periods by himself. Set up a play dough box for him, as well as a box filled with paper and markers. Encourage him to get these things out and play. If he insists you sit with him, start out playing with him, and try sneaking off for short periods of time to get him used to the idea of playing without you.

Before the baby comes try and get your son to do things on his own. Once your hands are full, getting him dressed is not going to be as easy. If your son already knows how to put on his jacket and slip into his shoes that’ll make your life much easier. But you don’t want to try teaching him these things right after the baby is born. He’s too shell shocked and your too tired.

Family and friends will be giddy with excitement when the new baby arrives. But make sure that when gifts land, there’s some for big brother too. Listening to “Don’t touch” and “That’s for the baby” all day is enough to make any firstborn fantasize about putting that noisy lump of clay out with the trash! You might have a stash of simple gifts for your son that you can give to him if people arrive without a present for big brother. Simple dollar store gifts will keep your son occupied while everyone fusses over the baby, and will make him feel special too.

Don’t expect your son to be in love with this baby right away. At first he has to get used to the idea of sharing his parent’s attention. And honestly, he’s feeling a little ripped off. This little lump that takes up so much of your time is too tiny to play with and is not exactly what he thought he was signing up for. It takes time to adjust to the new family dynamics. But once the new baby starts smiling at big brother, the two will start to make a connection.