[MysticHourglass]

My Husband and I want a baby. Heres my story we're both 23 have our own home and have relatively good jobs. So technically there is no reason not to have a baby now and get the baby years over so we can relate to our children without a big age gap.
My only problem is that I am scared s**tless about babies. I haven't really had to take care of a baby.I have been around friends babies, but they terrify me. Just thinking about not dropping them and them being so fragile. Plus I have the fear of not being able to relate to a baby and not understanding what a baby needs.
The thought of bringing a baby home and being on my own scares me. I dont know if anyone else has had this problem or even how to over come it. Its a major issue especially thinking about having to have daycare for 8 hours a day just to go back to work makes me feel like I would be a bad mom. If you could share your stories and maybe a little advice I would greatly appreciate it. Maybe a story about the first time you were alone with your newborn, and how daycare has helped you out.

[KatieBeach]

I can totally understand. I was kind of the opposite though - I'm the oldest of 8 kids and my Mom has a daycare... so I figured I would be just fine. Then I got my daughter home from the hospital and all of a sudden I was scared! These people actually let me take this beautiful little baby girl home and I had absolutely no clue what I was supposed to do with her. Actually bringing your baby is home is sooo different from watching other children. I don't think there really is much to prepare you for it. It's natural to worry about bringing home your first baby - and it's a learning experience you just have to be ready to go through. In the end it's scary, but you'll do just fine. As small and delicate as they seem babies really are pretty hearty little guys. We mangaged through by just keeping a level head. My mom assured me that a newborn just wants to eat, be changed and sleep - and she was of course right. That first night there were a few phone calls asking "ok, now what?" but we made through and the next night was better and so on.

As for going back to work - I worked fulltime after both my first and second children. The very first time I left my daughter in daycare I literally cried quietly to myself the whole way to work. I had felt the same way that you did - that I was somehow being a "bad" mom for not staying home even if it wasn't by choice. The truth of the matter is that my daughter was more than just fine - she was doing great! And when I got home to her everyday she was happy as could be. She (and her little brothers and sister) have all done everything just fine and been happy little kids. Daycare can really be a good thing - just find a provider that is inline with your parenting style and will respect your wishes. Get some suggestions from mom's you know and go out and interview a few of them to see what they're like. I like home family daycares, but maybe you like the structure that a center provides. Find someone that you are comfortable with and it will make all the difference.

Best of luck!!

[BabyMoon]

I agree with the previous poster. It's natural to be scared. Being responsible for a new baby is a huge life transition and a learning process. You don't necessarily feel like a "mother" the moment the baby is born, you grow into the role day by day. And yes, despite being small, babies are pretty hard to "break."

One of the best things I can recommend is finding a Postpartum Doula to help you through this transition. Postpartum Doulas provide practical help around the house and with the new baby, as well as emotional support as you deal with all the emotions associated with having a new baby.

I would also recommend taking advantage of any local classes on preparing for parenthood. Often wherever you take your childbirth prep classes, will offer newborn care classes. Another wonderful program is called "Bringing Baby Home." It deals with the emotional transitions and how to stay strong as a couple.

Good Luck!

[MysticHourglass]

Thank you your experience has helped me out a lot and I didnt know they offered bringing home baby classes. We are still talking about having a baby and all that goes along with them. I am excited and knowing someone who has been through my same fears helps out a lot especially knowing that im not alone in this world. motherhood is one of my biggest dreams and I just cant help but want to do it right. Thank you again