[Submitted Question]

I just found out that I am pregnant. For the most part I am thrilled, but I am also terrified of the birth itself. I don’t know if I can handle my fear as the time comes closer. Is there anything that will help me deal with my feelings so that I can concentrate on how happy I am to finally become a mom?

[WombToBloom]

Educate yourself! Talk to lots of other people – doctors, nurses, midwives, doulas, your mom, your sisters, your friends. The more information you have, the less nervous you are likely to be. If going to childbirth class, taking the hospital tour and quizzing your OB doesn’t seem to help, ask your doctor to refer you to a counselor to help you sort out your feelings. Don’t be embarrassed though – just about everyone is scared the first time. It is a total unknown, which can be so frightening. Surround yourself with a solid support system and trust that they will help you get through it!

[journeybirth]

Definitely take a childbirth birth class! Education can go a long ways towards easing your fears. Also consider hiring a doula - someone who knows what is normal can be reassuring.

[Doula Jenny]

watch: The Business of Being Born
read: Ina May's Guide to Child Birth
educate: take a child birth class.

[blindgren]

Besides all of the wonderful suggestions in the other posts, I'd also recommend HypnoBirthing childbirth classes. it really helps with fear in childbirth.
Barb
Welcome to Birth Baby Naturally

[iambarefoot]

Have you considered taking a birthing class? Perhaps learning about the actually birthing process will help alliviate your fears. I've had three babies, and I have nothing scary to report. Enjoy!!

[alossa]

When I found out I was pregnant I felt kinda the same way. It was a total unexpected pregnancy and I was no where ready to go through all the things child birth entailed. I had pretty much no support system so I found comfort in the joy of learning how my baby was growing. I don't know if it will help but every week I looked at pictures on the web of what my baby looked like and the changes that she was going through. It was pretty cool to realize what was actually going on week by week. When it came time to have my daughter I was so excited to see what she had become after 9 months (well 8 months and 3 weeks). I didn't take any birthing classes or anything, I figured my body would take over. And it did! I think one really good piece of advice, as others have said, is to talk to other mothers, people that have been through it. Childbirth is a gift women have, they are built for it. And P. S. Epidurals are great!

[originsdoula]

I agree with the above suggestions about childbirth education, doulas, and reading good books about birth. Reading Birthing From Within will really really help you.

Besides all these things I recommend that you don't watch tv dramas about birth (Baby Story, etc) because they portray birth as an emergency where the woman is not in control. And don't hesitate to shut down people who try to scare you into drugs or into a mentality of fear or insecurity in your ability to birth.

[ashers]

so my advice is a little different. first, let me tell you about my birth. first baby, 5 hours, 3 pushes. done. literally the easiest birth ever!! so it can really be that simple. you have to know that your perception on it will change the experience. if you are looking for it to be bad it will be. just know that women, for thousands of years, even before modern medicine and sanitation, birthed healthy, happy children. i reminded myself everyday that although magical, what i was going through was not unique. someone, somewhere had already done it. it is so much easier to have a baby now days than ever before and i have never met a mean labor and delivery nurse. you really have nothing to fear. worship yourself during this period and love the new you!!! your body will make sure the baby is taken care of, so why stress your mind out on something it will do naturally?!?!

hope you feel better.

-ashleigh

[massagefc]

I'll tell you a story. When my sister announced she was pregnant everyone screamed and rejoiced, that is, except me. I was terrified! I didn't want anything to happen to her as she was my best friend so I began to cry. Of course, I said they were tears of joy. And I was happy to have a new niece or nephew, but that started the begining of a great adventure for me! I was already a massage therapist and wanted to know how to help her through her pregnancy. I began reading anything that was recommended by doctors and nurses I knew. I also took a childbirth and lamaze class. Then I found a Certification for Pregnancy Massage as well as a Certified Doula course. I was able to give her pregnancy massage every week. I apprenticed as doula and helped two couples give birth before my sister's. By the time she was in labor I felt confident and comfortable. Woman have been giving birth for a VERY long time. It's a natural process. Just remember this. These others are right too-education is key! Talk with whom you can, take classes, and most of all - ENJOY THE EXPERIENCE! : )

Alesha- Proud Auntie of Donovyn and India
Essential Living
Doula & Massage Therapist